Or, why I need some time off.
I was talking to a fellow blogger the other day about the time she bought weed wearing a “Smile, Jesus loves you” t-shirt. The funniest part about that story is that I can see her doing that. After she told me about it and how weed makes her loopy (and not in a good way), I gave her some sage advice:
Don’t blog while you’re high.
I’ll refrain from driving traffic to the posts someone (not me, Mom) wrote while they were high because they’re beyond ridiculous. But let’s just say that writing one line that says:
KEYBOARD CAT IS FUCKING AMAZING
doesn’t constitute as blogging.
Unless you’re high.
Then, yes. It does. Very much so. Also, keyboard cat was fucking amazing and I can still remember that night and that little kitty in his blue shirt pounding on his keyboard like DUT-DUT-DUT/DUT-DUT-DUT. It’s good shit. So was the stuff I was smoking.
Like, I’m watching it right now and smiling. And I’m not even high.
The real disaster was when I tried to get all “serious reporter” status on the internet, writing about the Japanese tsunami and how terrible it was. I think I found some “unseen” footage and posted it on my blog, thinking I was a real life journalist. Unfortunately the footage was more along the lines of “Japanese tsunami caused by aliens.”
So sue me. I was high.